I have never wanted to scream in your face so much in my life.

' I miss you so much. I miss having my best friend, yet I know I can’t just tell you because you’ve moved on so much in your life that you just left me behind. But not everyone else. I miss the days where you used to be so easy to speak to, you would be there when I needed you most, and you promised me that you would be there for me forever. I hate how it has all changed now. Whenever I even try and talk to you now you don’t even bother to reply, the ODD chance you ever try and make plans with me it isn’t off your own back. Maybe you did sugar coat everything for me, but for the time you were there for me, I felt somewhat safe, because you’re more like me than you think. Another reason why I don’t understand why this has happened. I get that you have moved on and obviously found something amazing to focus your life on now, but did you really have to just dump me out of your future? '

" I keep on thinking about all the bad things about you, and how much I used to worry about you and how I used to defend you when people would talk terribly of you. I so badly want to hate you, but I know that you’re a good person, which is what frustrates me. I know you’re a good person, you just make bad decisions... "

" I never wanted anything the way that I want you. But my words don't seem to matter. And you look at me and I can see. The lies you're running too. But my words don't seem to matter..."

- lyrics by Secondhand Serenade

And suddenly I become a part of your past, I'm becoming the part that don't last. I'm losing you and it's effortless. Without a sound, we lose sight of the ground in the throw around. Never thought that you wanted to bring it down. I won't let it go down till we torch it ourselves...♥

- Over my head by The Fray

What if i fell to the floor?!... Couldn't take this anymore?! What would you do.? Come! break me down! bury me, bury me! I am finished with you!... look in my eyes... You are killing me, killing me! All i wanted was you! ...

- The Kill by Thirty Seconds to Mars

Memories...

Memories... Images of the past. Moments of when i was happy in your arms. Images of your soft gaze and the taste of your sweet lips, it's all I have left in this sad night. There are times when i can still feel your presence and I can still smell your essence. Only on those occasions, I give into the luxury of loosing myself completely in time and space. Even though your memory wants to take me to the bottom of an abyss. Even when it wants to take me to my own destruction. I admit it, I can't stop thinking about you. Your memory follows me around, everywhere i go. I've got nowhere else to hide. I'm not even safe inside my dreams. You appear every now and then, on my dreams, and you confuse my reality. You are that hope that illuminates my days every time you talk to me and at the same time yo try killing me, asphyxiating me with your absence. You voice is the sweet melody that I need to hear everyday. And even thought I want to have you once again by my side more than anything in the world; I also long for the day when I would no longer be a prisoner of this love. Of the memories, of my own pain, of your betrayal and of myself. One day you will see what you have done, that it's not just what you think. With my eyes closed, clenched fists and tears coming down my face, I admit that i still miss you and i still love you more than you can imagine, not that it matters, it doesn't make any difference. The images of those happy moments have come to invade my mind once again. Truth be told, this is becoming a masochistic thing. It hurts me and at the same time i like what I'm feeling because this is the only way to feel like you are here with me; it's the only way to know that somewhere you do exist, that you are real and not just a dream. You are my favorite mistake. Mistake because i never should have trusted you the way I did. But my favorite one because loving you was the best thing. I can't believe you were the one to make me happy and then tear me apart. Images from the most pure and sincere moments come to my mind. Also those moments of passion and the moments when we both felt pain. Tonight, with a couple of songs, I will be consumed in my own pain and then everything will be forgotten. I will be able to sleep somewhat peacefully until you show up in my dreams or until tomorrow, when your absence once again, tries to take my breath away from me and the memories invade me once again... Memories...

I know the image is from a volcano but its such a beautiful image.

" I really should stop thinking this stuff, the same stuff I thought about yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that. It gets me nowhere, I need to brush it off and make myself happy, ‘cause I usually find that once I forget about the things that are bothering me, they have a habit of sorting themselves out on their own. "

" What is your problem? Why is it such a hard work to talk to you these days? Seriously, make up your fucking mind, because I feel like I’m just floating around aimlessly until you do. I have no purpose. I’m anxious. I constantly feel like I’m waiting for something or that something is at the back of my mind. I’m really exhausted at the minute, and I’m barely leaving the house so it can’t be for any real reason, just pure mental exhaustion. And the stupid part is, YOU could change it so easily, because it all depends on you, but you don’t. You just leave me hanging, yet again. "

" You can try your hardest - you can do everything within your means; but sometimes people just aren’t worth it anymore. They aren’t worth all the tears and worrying, and it’s important to know when to let go of someone who only brings you down. "