Memories...

Memories... Images of the past. Moments of when i was happy in your arms. Images of your soft gaze and the taste of your sweet lips, it's all I have left in this sad night. There are times when i can still feel your presence and I can still smell your essence. Only on those occasions, I give into the luxury of loosing myself completely in time and space. Even though your memory wants to take me to the bottom of an abyss. Even when it wants to take me to my own destruction. I admit it, I can't stop thinking about you. Your memory follows me around, everywhere i go. I've got nowhere else to hide. I'm not even safe inside my dreams. You appear every now and then, on my dreams, and you confuse my reality. You are that hope that illuminates my days every time you talk to me and at the same time yo try killing me, asphyxiating me with your absence. You voice is the sweet melody that I need to hear everyday. And even thought I want to have you once again by my side more than anything in the world; I also long for the day when I would no longer be a prisoner of this love. Of the memories, of my own pain, of your betrayal and of myself. One day you will see what you have done, that it's not just what you think. With my eyes closed, clenched fists and tears coming down my face, I admit that i still miss you and i still love you more than you can imagine, not that it matters, it doesn't make any difference. The images of those happy moments have come to invade my mind once again. Truth be told, this is becoming a masochistic thing. It hurts me and at the same time i like what I'm feeling because this is the only way to feel like you are here with me; it's the only way to know that somewhere you do exist, that you are real and not just a dream. You are my favorite mistake. Mistake because i never should have trusted you the way I did. But my favorite one because loving you was the best thing. I can't believe you were the one to make me happy and then tear me apart. Images from the most pure and sincere moments come to my mind. Also those moments of passion and the moments when we both felt pain. Tonight, with a couple of songs, I will be consumed in my own pain and then everything will be forgotten. I will be able to sleep somewhat peacefully until you show up in my dreams or until tomorrow, when your absence once again, tries to take my breath away from me and the memories invade me once again... Memories...